God offers a fullness of love. His heart is standing in abundance, fully loving you. We talk a lot about submission and surrender, but in the kingdom, that offering isn’t taken and thrown away. That offering is accepted with humility and love. God loves us. Our core understanding of salvation says that Jesus came because of His great LOVE for us.
Of all the things I’ve written, and out of all the reasons I’ve written them, the biggest reason that I run after Jesus is because of His love. I trust Him. I trust that He is salvation, that He forgives me, that He holds me and pursues me.
Gods pursuit of me hasn’t always been so clear to me though. As a child I always felt like I had to earn His love. I would cry out time and time again and wait to “feel” loved. Then I would put ridiculous expectations on “my own efforts” to get to Gods love. I remember when I was even in Jr.High, just forming my relationship with Jesus, I had a goal chart for my quiet times. I had it in my prayer journal, pray today… check.. read my Bible… check… write scripture in my journal… check. I honestly thought that’s what God desired! Even though i knew that it wasn’t “works” that brought me to Him. How was it that I knew about God, but I didn’t know Him! I knew how wonderful He was, and how I needed Him, but I didn’t know Him.
My relationship with the Lord wasn’t personal, or even understanding that God didn’t need my check boxes, He desired my heart.
I think God loves us so much that He waits until we are done fluffing up our feathers, fixing our hair and makeup, until we are presentable for Him, but He doesn’t want that from us. He wants to love us in private, alone and intimately. He wants the brokenness, every piece of our heart to love. He wants to flood every part of our being, so that we can be filled and fulfilled in Him.
One of my favorite verses has been Matthew 10:29. It says, “are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground outside your fathers care. And even the very hairs on your head are all numbered. So, don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.” I’ve held onto this verse for many years. One of the reasons being that this was one of the first verses that the Lord spoke directly to my heart showing how much He loves me. Out of all my striving and trying to fill in my check boxes, He spoke directly to me and showed me that out of all the beautiful things He created, I’m valued and loved. That out of the whole earth, He knows me and all the intimate details of my being. How? Why?
You know, I talk a lot about placing my life on the altar. I write about living a Romans 12 life, filled with my heart as a “living sacrifice”. At this place in my life, I constantly give my heart to the Lord, asking Him to purify me, let me be His fully. But my prayers didn’t start there. I truly believe that salvation starts with love. The reason that we keep coming back to Jesus is because of His loving-kindness. His deep love that he pours out over us brings more fulfillment than one check box.
He calls our name.
He knows our hearts.
He sings sweet songs over us.
He prepares a feast to sit with Him and know Him.
He speaks to us intimately.
He forgives all our wrongs.
He calls us know know Him.
This is the reason I’m want to live my life fully for Him. It’s not only His holy nature, that God is big and powerful. It’s because Jesus come close and embraces me. He holds my heart and loves me well.
